Small Surrenders

Sometimes defeat doesn't come all at once. Sometimes it sneaks up on you in bits and pieces. Today we're going to talk about holding the line. About not making the small surrenders that lead to the massive defeats.

Little Things

Cliches are cliches for a reason. Sometimes it really is the little things. Ask people who have fallen victim to addiction, abuse, or any number of other life altering defeats. Chances are that at least one of them will tell you that it happened gradually.

A few drinks out with friends. He only grabbed my arms because he was so angry. Then it becomes drinks every night, and he only yells when I disagree. Slowly but surely, step by step, surrender by surrender, you allow the line to slip further and further. Until one day you wake up to a life, to a self you don't even recognize anymore.

It isn't only drastic and horrible circumstances that come about from this. It can be the small compromises you make with yourself. I'll just have one cookie. I'll just skip a work out this once. I'll just be a few minutes late. Rarely do these things ever stay at just once. Before you know it, you'll find yourself contriving all kinds of excuses to repeat them, and end up waking up to that life you don't recognize and never wanted.

Holding The Line

The solution to this is simple: You hold the line. You don't compromise. You don't tolerate the poor treatment. You don't make excuses for others or yourself. You do the workout when you don't want to. You leave and show up early when you're tired or inconvenienced. You make the choice every time, every day. To not compromise. To not back down.

Obviously mistakes happen. But that is what they are: mistakes. You don't brush them off or excuse them somehow. You judge yourself harshly, and you acknowledge what lead to the failure. You firmly bring yourself back in line, and do not repeat the behavior.

By never allowing yourself to give so much as an inch, you are never in danger of letting the line gradually slip so far that you don't even recognize where it is anymore. And once you know you can hold the line there and not surrender, not give in to even the small compromises, you can start pushing it in the opposite direction. You can do MORE each day. Then, even if you fall short, you're only falling back to the line, to point of zero compromise.

So long as you hold that line, you can always move forward again the next time. And once you do, you can draw a new line, set a new standard. In this way you are not allowing yourself those little defeats, and always moving forward.

What Are Your Small Surrenders?

As always, I want to hear from all of you. Tell us about the small surrenders and little defeats you face and how you avoid them. Or tell us about a time that you did slip, and how you made it back to hold the line.